(The woman groans, moans, grunts, and screams. Chandler뭩 eyes get huge!)
Chandler: Woah, woah, that뭩 not pretty!
Man on TV: Now, push!
Woman on TV: Ow! Ow! Ooh! That hurts!
Chandler: Worst porn ever! Worst porn ever! (Chandler starts to press buttons on the remote control, frantically.)
Woman on TV: Ohhh! Make it stop!
Chandler: I am trying!
[Scene: Joey뭩. Joey is playing fetch with the dog.]
Joey: Get the ball, ready? Get the ball, get the ball! (Joey pretends to throw it, but really doesn뭪, and the dog goes running off.) Well, you뭨e cute, but you뭨e not too smart!
(The dog returns with a ball that looks exactly like the same one Joey has.)
Joey: (looking at the ball the dog brought back) Did I just throw this?
Rachel: (entering) Hi.
Joey: Hi.
Rachel: I accidentally packed these with my stuff. (looks at the dog and gasps) Who is this?
Joey: Oh, that뭩, uh, that뭩 Phoebe뭩 friend뭩 dog. I don뭪 know what his real name is, but I call him Mozzarella.
Rachel: (talking with a higher voice, and puckered lips꿮ind of like you do to a baby or...well꿢 puppy꿬t뭩 hard to explain. Just use your imagination!) Oh, well, you are so cute! I wish I could play with you more, but I뭭e got to go to work! I hope I stop talking like this before my marketing meeting, yes I do. Yes I do. (still talking like that) Bye-bye, Joey. Oh, I seriously can뭪 stop it. (exits)
Joey: (to the dog) C뭢ere. Hey. C뭢ere. That뭩 Rachel. She뭩 the one who used to live here. Might as well be honest with you뾵e love her. But we can뭪 have her. I really miss her. Well, hey, you understand, right? You뭨e a guy. (thinks about it and picks up the dog and looks) Well, you used to be.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler뭩. Chandler is sitting on the couch staring at the tape on the coffee table with his eyes huge and his mouth wide open.]
Monica: (entering from her bedroom) So what do you think? (referring to her outfit)
(Chandler glances up at Monica with his mouth still wide open and his eyes still huge)
Monica: (to herself) I뭭e still got it!
Chandler: (pointing at the video) Why did you get me this?
Monica: What is it?
Chandler: It뭩 yelling꿣leeding꿥ilating. Oh, the dilating?/P>
Monica: Is this the video of the baby being born? Sweetie, this is Phoebe뭩. Why were you even watching it?
Chandler: I thought꿲aybe뀂ou got me porn for Valentine뭩 Day.
Monica: Chandler, if you thought I was going to get you porn for Valentine뭩 Day?(pulls a video out of a basket) you were right! Apparently, it뭩 about a young girl who moves to the big city, you know, in search of stardom, but ends up having sex with a lot of guys! Yeah, it got four starts! (looks closer) Oh, wait a minute. Those aren뭪 stars. Anyway, you want to take a look?
Chandler: Well, I뭢 not really in a sexy mood right now.
Monica: Honey, what뭩 going on?
Chandler: Well, remember the first time we saw Jaws?
Monica: Mm-hmm.
Chandler: How long it took to go back in the water?
Monica: Chandler, we can뭪 let this tape wreck Valentine뭩 Day!
Chandler: You don뭪 know. You didn뭪 see it.
Monica: Child-birth, it뭩 a natural thing! It뭩 beautiful.
Chandler: Oh, beautiful? Really? Beautiful? You think this is beautiful? (picks up the remote and presses a button, and he immediately makes a face that just looks like he뭩 going to throw up!)
Monica: Oh! Oh, my God! No wonder my mother hates me!
Chandler: See, honey, there뭩?puts his hand on her leg)
Monica: Don뭪 touch me!
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross is sitting on the couch reading a magazine as Mona enters.]
Mona: Hi!
Ross: Hey! (they hug) So, how was Atlantic City?
Mona: Good.
Ross: Yeah?
Mona: I brought you back a present.
Ross: Wha? Oh, come on. You didn뭪 have to뾱altwater taffy?! (Mona laughs) Thanks! This is interesting. You know, most people think this is made with sea water, but it뭩 actually made with, uh, salted fresh water. That뭩 not interesting.
Mona: I think it뭩 interesting.
Ross: I do too! I missed you!
Mona: I missed you, too! So, how was your week?
Ross: Oh, it was good! It was good. Actually, the baby started kicking!
Mona: How exciting!
Ross: Yeah! I know! It was. Oh?the only sad thing is I wasn뭪 around when it happened for the first time.
Mona: Oh no.
Ross: Yeah, I뭢 missing out on all this other stuff, too. So, Joey suggested Rachel move in with me.
Season 8 Episode 15 (2)
Man on TV: Yeah, just relax.
Chandler: I love you, St. Valentine.
(The woman groans, moans, grunts, and screams. Chandler뭩 eyes get huge!)
Chandler: Woah, woah, that뭩 not pretty!
Man on TV: Now, push!
Woman on TV: Ow! Ow! Ooh! That hurts!
Chandler: Worst porn ever! Worst porn ever! (Chandler starts to press buttons on the remote control, frantically.)
Woman on TV: Ohhh! Make it stop!
Chandler: I am trying!
[Scene: Joey뭩. Joey is playing fetch with the dog.]
Joey: Get the ball, ready? Get the ball, get the ball! (Joey pretends to throw it, but really doesn뭪, and the dog goes running off.) Well, you뭨e cute, but you뭨e not too smart!
(The dog returns with a ball that looks exactly like the same one Joey has.)
Joey: (looking at the ball the dog brought back) Did I just throw this?
Rachel: (entering) Hi.
Joey: Hi.
Rachel: I accidentally packed these with my stuff. (looks at the dog and gasps) Who is this?
Joey: Oh, that뭩, uh, that뭩 Phoebe뭩 friend뭩 dog. I don뭪 know what his real name is, but I call him Mozzarella.
Rachel: (talking with a higher voice, and puckered lips꿮ind of like you do to a baby or...well꿢 puppy꿬t뭩 hard to explain. Just use your imagination!) Oh, well, you are so cute! I wish I could play with you more, but I뭭e got to go to work! I hope I stop talking like this before my marketing meeting, yes I do. Yes I do. (still talking like that) Bye-bye, Joey. Oh, I seriously can뭪 stop it. (exits)
Joey: (to the dog) C뭢ere. Hey. C뭢ere. That뭩 Rachel. She뭩 the one who used to live here. Might as well be honest with you뾵e love her. But we can뭪 have her. I really miss her. Well, hey, you understand, right? You뭨e a guy. (thinks about it and picks up the dog and looks) Well, you used to be.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler뭩. Chandler is sitting on the couch staring at the tape on the coffee table with his eyes huge and his mouth wide open.]
Monica: (entering from her bedroom) So what do you think? (referring to her outfit)
(Chandler glances up at Monica with his mouth still wide open and his eyes still huge)
Monica: (to herself) I뭭e still got it!
Chandler: (pointing at the video) Why did you get me this?
Monica: What is it?
Chandler: It뭩 yelling꿣leeding꿥ilating. Oh, the dilating?/P>
Monica: Is this the video of the baby being born? Sweetie, this is Phoebe뭩. Why were you even watching it?
Chandler: I thought꿲aybe뀂ou got me porn for Valentine뭩 Day.
Monica: Chandler, if you thought I was going to get you porn for Valentine뭩 Day?(pulls a video out of a basket) you were right! Apparently, it뭩 about a young girl who moves to the big city, you know, in search of stardom, but ends up having sex with a lot of guys! Yeah, it got four starts! (looks closer) Oh, wait a minute. Those aren뭪 stars. Anyway, you want to take a look?
Chandler: Well, I뭢 not really in a sexy mood right now.
Monica: Honey, what뭩 going on?
Chandler: Well, remember the first time we saw Jaws?
Monica: Mm-hmm.
Chandler: How long it took to go back in the water?
Monica: Chandler, we can뭪 let this tape wreck Valentine뭩 Day!
Chandler: You don뭪 know. You didn뭪 see it.
Monica: Child-birth, it뭩 a natural thing! It뭩 beautiful.
Chandler: Oh, beautiful? Really? Beautiful? You think this is beautiful? (picks up the remote and presses a button, and he immediately makes a face that just looks like he뭩 going to throw up!)
Monica: Oh! Oh, my God! No wonder my mother hates me!
Chandler: See, honey, there뭩?puts his hand on her leg)
Monica: Don뭪 touch me!
[Scene: Central Perk. Ross is sitting on the couch reading a magazine as Mona enters.]
Mona: Hi!
Ross: Hey! (they hug) So, how was Atlantic City?
Mona: Good.
Ross: Yeah?
Mona: I brought you back a present.
Ross: Wha? Oh, come on. You didn뭪 have to뾱altwater taffy?! (Mona laughs) Thanks! This is interesting. You know, most people think this is made with sea water, but it뭩 actually made with, uh, salted fresh water. That뭩 not interesting.
Mona: I think it뭩 interesting.
Ross: I do too! I missed you!
Mona: I missed you, too! So, how was your week?
Ross: Oh, it was good! It was good. Actually, the baby started kicking!
Mona: How exciting!
Ross: Yeah! I know! It was. Oh?the only sad thing is I wasn뭪 around when it happened for the first time.
Mona: Oh no.
Ross: Yeah, I뭢 missing out on all this other stuff, too. So, Joey suggested Rachel move in with me.
Mona: (laughing) Yeah right!