------------------Chronic Pain------------------ I wish there were words, phrases, sentences I can put into for what I am feeling right now. IT IS PAINFUL! Wait. There's more to it. There's this something... I don't know... it is my head or my heart or my brain picking up electric signals wrong and messing up with emotion controls. I just don't know how to describe this pain... It's all mixed up. All coming from the same source. It's desire, hope, craving, yearning, longing, seeking, searching, reaching out, trying to grasp.... Why does this hurt so much? Does it have to? what is this feeling I feel like nothing of this world can or should fill it ever. At first I thought it was some companionship I needed. Like warm body, hands to hold. Maybe it's the past memories that i sometimes reflect and look in vain. When I first read that C.s. Lewis said it was JOY, I thought it funny. How can you yearn joy. Or why does it give pain? Is joy the opposite meaning for pain? Better, not feeling pain is the opposite word for pain. Like, being normal, you know. Oh, but I ACHE, ACHE, ACHE! How can you feel sorrowful, brokenhearted, empty, betrayed, hurt, painful, all at the same time because you're longing for joy? But then, I'm understanding it now. The absence of JOY in my heart, in my soul, in ME! THE ABSENCE OF JOY!!! YES, THE ONLY CURE!!! I'm broken in the heart because nothing from this world can fill that place. It was from the beginning meant for Joy only. Nothing else can take that place. Can I make myself more clear in this. See, when God created us, he made a special place for Himself. He carved JOY into our heart. When that place is attempted with anything but JOY, we break apart sooner or later. Does this pain go away? Like... EVER? I hope not. I ACHE, I ACHE, I ACHE Therefore, I AM, I AM, I AM. Because it means you still have that piece of something that does not belong to this world. It will keep you from forgetting completely about HIM, and HIS KINGDOM. Plus, You remember that nothing, NOTHING from down here can ever make you complete except your maker. In the meantime, work it out.
Chronic Pain
------------------Chronic Pain------------------
I wish there were words, phrases, sentences
I can put into for what I am feeling right now.
IT IS PAINFUL!
Wait. There's more to it.
There's this something... I don't know... it is my
head or my heart or my brain picking up
electric signals wrong and messing up with
emotion controls.
I just don't know how to describe this pain...
It's all mixed up. All coming from the same source.
It's desire, hope, craving, yearning, longing,
seeking, searching, reaching out, trying to grasp....
Why does this hurt so much?
Does it have to?
what is this feeling I feel like nothing of this world can or should fill it ever.
At first I thought it was some companionship
I needed. Like warm body, hands to hold.
Maybe it's the past memories that i sometimes
reflect and look in vain.
When I first read that C.s. Lewis said it was JOY,
I thought it funny.
How can you yearn joy.
Or why does it give pain?
Is joy the opposite meaning for pain?
Better, not feeling pain is the opposite word
for pain. Like, being normal, you know.
Oh, but I ACHE, ACHE, ACHE!
How can you feel sorrowful, brokenhearted, empty,
betrayed, hurt, painful, all at the same time
because you're longing for joy?
But then, I'm understanding it now.
The absence of JOY in my heart, in my soul, in ME!
THE ABSENCE OF JOY!!!
YES, THE ONLY CURE!!!
I'm broken in the heart because nothing from this
world can fill that place. It was from the beginning
meant for Joy only. Nothing else can take that place.
Can I make myself more clear in this.
See, when God created us, he made a special place
for Himself. He carved JOY into our heart.
When that place is attempted with anything but
JOY, we break apart sooner or later.
Does this pain go away?
Like... EVER?
I hope not.
I ACHE, I ACHE, I ACHE
Therefore, I AM, I AM, I AM.
Because it means you still have that piece of
something that does not belong to this world.
It will keep you from forgetting completely
about HIM, and HIS KINGDOM.
Plus, You remember that nothing, NOTHING from
down here can ever make you complete
except your maker.
In the meantime, work it out.