시네마 천국 1988 / 감독. 쥬세페 토르나토레

What are you thinking, Toto?

We've never really talked, Mum.
When I was little, I saw you... as an old woman already.

Maybe all kids are like that, who knows?

It's taken me all this time...
...to realize that you were young then, and beautiful. You had your whole life ahead of you.
Why, then? Why did you stay on your own?
Without anyone to look after you.
You could have remarried. Why didn't you?
I might not have understood at the time...
But later... yes.

There was never anyone, if that's what you're thinking.
I didn't want to.
I remained faithful, first to your father...
...and then to you and Lia.
It's the way I am, what can I do?
And you're like me. You're too attached to the past.
I'm not sure it's a good thing.
Being faithful has its drawbacks. Fidelity brings loneliness.




I've always been afraid to come back.
Now, after all these years...
...I thought I was stonger and had forgotten many things.
But it's all right there in front of me...
...as if I'd never gone away.
And yet, I hardly know Lia.
And you, Mum...
I deserted you.
I ran away like a criminal.
Without an explanation.

I never asked for one.
You don't have to explain.
I always thought you were doing the right thing.
Don't dwell on it.
Only one thing bothered me.
At night, before I went to bed...
...I'd lock the door,

You never used to.

I know.
When you worked in the cinema, late at night...
...I could never sleep till you got home.
Then, when you got back...
...I pretended to be asleep. But I was aware of all your movements.
Then, when you were asleep, I'd get up...
...and lock the door.
After you'd gone...
...whenever I did that...
...I felt as though I was locking someone out.
Shutting him off.
You were right to leave.
It allowed you to do what you wanted.
.
.
.
Here, there are only ghosts.
Let go, Toto.